Mens Health Month

RAINNEWS June 2017

Men and boys who have been sexually assaulted or abused face the same mental and physical effects as other survivors. Cultural stereotypes about men and how they portray masculinity can sometimes feel toxic to male survivors, adding additional challenges to their experience.

Recovering from sexual assault or abuse is a process that looks different for everyone, and it’s important to support a survivor, no matter their gender identity. Focusing on self-care after a sexual assault is a vital step toward recovery. Sexual assault can affect the physical and emotional health of a survivor, so it’s important to address both components of self-care. Should a victim choose to seek professional help, therapy can provide a space to openly discuss their thoughts and experiences.

One out of every 10 rape victims is male. It’s crucial to remind male survivors that they are not alone and share the services available to help them through their recovery.

Survivors can call the National Sexual Assault Hotline 800.656.HOPE (4653) or visit online.rainn.org to be connected with local sexual assault service providers in their area. RAINN also partners with 1in6, an organization dedicated to helping men who survived unwanted or abusive sexual experiences in childhood. If something happened to you, know that you are not alone and help is available. This Men’s Health Month—and all year round—join RAINN in supporting all survivors.

https://www.rainn.org/news/male-sexual-assault-road-recovery

Thank you for reading. RAINN is an excellent Sexual Assult resources for men and women.

M

Additional resources:

 

60 Comments on “Male Sexual Assault-Road to Recovery

    • Hi Simon
      There are many men who have no idea this is happening around them. I’m focusing my advocacy work on men, shining a light the struggles men face and often do not talk about.
      I hope you’re doing well. I’m have insomnia and running on 48 hours without sleep. Part of the issue is me, there are not enough hours in the day.
      Take care and have a great weekend.
      M

      Liked by 1 person

      • Yes, when I do sleep it can range from 10 to 24 hours. It works out in the long run.
        I’m happy to hear your head is not buried in the sand on the topic of males sexual assault. In America, few men speak out so most suffer in silence. Is it different in England?
        M

        Liked by 1 person

      • Not really, it’s much the same here with many men who don’t know about it and ignorant behaviour putting off many from speaking out.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Thanks, curios if there is any country who address the trauma the same as a women being raped. Time will help me learn, to sick to google myself silly looking for the answers. I don’t know if I told you, I can’t feel the inside of my hands. It makes typing difficult on days when I shake to much. I’m not complaining, I woke up today, I’m alive, its a good day.
        I am by nature extremely curious and a awesome researcher, I’ve been told. But those days are on hold now.
        There’s always tomorrow. I haven’t received a new post from you, anything new? Sometimes the Reader does crazy things with blogs I follow. WP claims to have no idea how all the people I follow got unfollowed! That’s life.
        Take care.
        M

        Liked by 1 person

      • I have people that I’ve unfollowed for no reason too. Its weird. I’ve posted several posts this week… The reader isn’t great.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Thanks Simon
        I don’t always put myself first. My illness needs my full attention, I’m a giver by nature. My past pain and trauma redirects giving to myself, I love to make a difference is someone’s life. That’s living!
        Hugs
        M

        Liked by 1 person

      • It’s difficult, engrained behavior from my traumatic younger life. I only wanted to die, started making attempts at 9 yrs old. Yet what I learned from my grandparents is how good I felt inside to help in the smallest way. Now I tell myself, have to get stronger, expand my mind so memory comes back, get oriented to time and space to drive again. It’s been close to 3 yrs since I’ve driven. I don’t know who I am, other than a Blogger who has empathy and passion for sharing to help someone. I push myself, after two years in bed you have to kick yourself in the ass to make the next step. I have no friends or family, I can entertain myself without a problem. Art, photography, college courses. But I’ve lost who I am in my gut, sure not the person before sick. My illness does not have a cure, I have to balance being aware of what I need to keep an eye on without letting it stop me. I’m a very strong headed women and I will get there soon. My husband bought me a new car two weeks ago, I’m ready when his at work to back out and drive around the block, see how well I do. From there I can form who I am today at 53. Which isn’t that old in the big scheme. When I think about dying from my illness, I see a broken old aging person with part of a memory. I have to reach a point of loving myself again and dealing with what is looking back in the mirror. My mind still thinks I’m a beauty of my younger years, it’s quite a conflict from what I see. If no-one tells you you’re beautiful, you don’t think it over time.
        I’m rambling, it’s been a hard week.
        I know you understand what I’m saying. Your brain processes at a higher level than average. Nothing average about you Simon.
        Take care, do something wonderful with you family this weekend! Family time can’t be replicated.
        M

        Like

      • They have bailed me out a couple of times when I made big mistakes when to sick, so I don’t complain much. I still have memory problems and they work with me until I understand. I have them send a copy of the chat and it helps do the task. I was on a chat with Friday for about an hour on two issues. They she was a total professional. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • One of the issues that may be a disconnect is there is WordPress.org and WordPress.com. It appears WP.org provides the operationing system and on going programming to WP.com. The communication what not be fluid, the craziest stuff happens with no reason when talking to support engineers.
        What do you do for a living>
        M

        Liked by 1 person

      • When I was younger in the prime of my career and making over $300K a year, I was an alcoholic, arrogant and didn’t care. If the money was rewarding my for being a hard nose bitch so be it. I look back and say I’m sure glad not that person anymore. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • I grew up not only with an busive background but mostly lower middle class. I don’t think that was the problem as much as family members who were crazy, drug addicts, having babies at 14 yrs old, the hillbillies as I called them. On granny’s side was the mob so it was quite the contrast. I bought a house at 21 yrs old and was more broke than ever. I set my goals high to change things. It took until my late 20’s to get a high paying job. I like not having to worry if I have gas money and what am I going to eat. I was blessed to get rewarded for my work ethic. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • Those kinds of high paying jobs aren’t as common over here. Hillbillies eh? You’re from the south? With the mob on the other side you had quite a family mix.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I’m quite proud of the Mob connections, totally fascinated with the hiearical society. Just one groups are hit men it’s cool. My granny had a brother, Uncle Peanut we called him. He robbed a bank and buried the money so his wife could not find it. He went to Alcatraze with some of his others guys. Ray Hamilton was not at top but leader of lower level guys, he tried to escape Alcatraza but didn’t get very far. Life was very different back in the early 1900″s. My granny was born in 1921 and her brother in mob, uncle Bud, not his name was killed in my grandparents house by cianide. I have on of his guns. I treasure it. When my dad was a teenager he said Bud came home one day threw a sack with 10K is it and told my father to get in house and don’t let anything happen to the money. Daddy knew the people who killed Bud, we was hiding in the closet in the room he was killed it. Mob is cool hillbillies are another story. We have plenty losers in the family to.
        🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • It’s my fascination, my grandmother’s family had a background in. Uncle Bud dies before I met him. Uncle Peanut I new well, we one over often after his heart surgery. He was sly, I always wondered how many people he killed. He’s the same one that buried the money. I can’t see well right now because the Lyme but I read so many books true and not about mob. It was totally Coll in Russia. The Nostra (mob) were living a good life. I stayed in St. Petersburg. there are two 5 star hotels, the one I stayed was the Astoria. I was schedule to leave the morning of 911, when the airspace was open a couple weeks later I was on my way. I love the adventure of traveling to an unknown country and not know the language. While having a glass of wine with Hospitality Manager one night I asked about the Nostra. He said, there here all the time. Class, never bother anybody just eat drink and have small meetings. I found a place to eat one day around 3:00, a man and much younger woman were the only people there. The man barely took his eyes off me. I guess they meet their mistress late afternoon. When they left he came right close to my chair and said American right?
        That was such a silly question, I’ve heard in most countries women don’t travel alone so pretty good guess. I loved St. Petersburg. Very rich in history with the Romanov families.
        It was very strange, since it was clear I was American, people would come up to me on the streets and tell me how story they were to here what happened in America. Probably the closest I ever thought everyone is standing together. That BS didn’t last long. know look at the mess that is happening. It makes me so mad.
        Terrorist and mob are very different, terrorist I would have no problem killing.
        Englad and Paris have had more than their share the last year.
        M

        Liked by 1 person

      • It’s has me concerned how it escalates from here. There are no stopping terrorist. I does anger me when I hear a bomer in England was the FBI radar. We are civilized people, terrorist are not. At times my mind starts to think why wait if we know who they are kill them first. The US would freak out and go overboard but look at how long we’ve been at war and the terrorist are everywhere. Over two years ago Boko Haram kidnapped 200 girls in Nigeria, only a handful have been released. It’s common in Nigeria. I had a blogging friend who lived there and she said the government is totally corrupt and Boko Haram sent most of the time in the northern area killing Christians.
        If I did believe strongly about God, I would use the saying an eye for an eye. The war with extreme Islamist has been going on for two thousand years, don’t see that changing. Now the thug terrorist misrepresent the Quran and say they are ridding the world of infidels. Jihad was meant as, if someone is trying to kill you, you have the right to defend yourself. Todays terrorist don’t have to have a reason, let’s kill our own people and everyone else. It’s a scary time.
        It doesn’t help when every single thing that happens the media jumps to say was this a terrorist attack. No there are just some crazy people out there who want to kill their ex employer. That happen here last week then he set the office building on fire before killing himself. The media was talking about is this a terrorist attack and blowing smoke before they knew anything.
        It wouldn’t be a problem but so many people think if they said it on TV or newspaper it must be true? I don’t even watch the news. My husband does and the only time I pay attention is when another country is targeted by terrorist..
        Well, you got more than a few cents worth out of that comment.
        🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • I got lots from that comment, the big problem there isn’t God as such but the human perversion of religion and the lack of love and acceptance among us. Pile on top of that the media obsession with a big story and who knows’ what’s going on.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Did I tell you I’m focusing my Advocacy work to organizations of Twitter? My memory is still very short. I have a list of resources people can turn to but no in-depth info. I decided to follow around 30 Chaity & support groups and really hone in on what the deliverable is or are they blowing smoke. I’ve meet some very nice people, it feels great to offer a lift or affirmation to some one who hasn’t made it to the other side like I have. I’m not following many individuals but enough to see what they get from working with an org I’m following. It’s been very rewarding.
        Last week the President of an organization focused on men asked my to write for them! WOW! I was shocked. The interest is mostly directed at mental illness. I have homework to do this weekend to see what type of post is valuable. They have over 10K followers, they can’t be to shabby.
        There is another mens group I would love to work with called Men Heal, it’s direct at Sexual Abuse. I have so much to learn about how men processes their pain. I’m not a great writer but my heart is in each post and I want to educate people with more knowledge about what this organization offers support. I don’t think my guys in the group are looking for a Facebook page to chat on, they need real help and learning how to handle triggers. I’m very excited.
        Like I said, helping people is so rewarding. I wanted to be a Therapist but hated school. I’ve taken many college courses on the topic but forget the degree BS.
        How are you? I’m rambled on so long.
        M

        Liked by 1 person

      • I’m good I think. Its really interesting what you’re doing and its a shame that this kind of thing isn’t being done as part of mainstream health work.

        Liked by 1 person

      • The problem reaching men is the stigma and most have repressed memories. They know something bad happened but not sure. Complex Therapy and takes a long time to bring back to memory without bring to much and overwhelm them. There are a couple of guys in my collaborative site who were abused as children. As men they are searching and it’s very painful and depressing. I want to understand more. I was sexually abused as a child, teen and adult but I remember everything so it’s easier to work thru with therapy.
        M

        Liked by 1 person

      • The stigma doesn’t help the guys and helps reinforce that block I would think

        Like

      • One key reason I agreed to write for the men’s organization. It is one of the least talked about abuse. I would image it is also hard to find the right Therapist who knows how to deal with delicate territory. Normal tactics won’t work. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • I can’t see how normal methods would work, with men there is this attitude of get on with it or not to complain.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I’ve felt strongly about giving thanks, even more while helping my grandparents as they were dying at home. I can’t tell you how good it felt to give them there wishes to die at home. I was able to quit work and spent close to 7-8 years caring for until 2010 when gramps died. Their dying was the most difficult and enlightening experience for me.
        M

        Liked by 1 person

      • It was heartbreaking, my grandparents raised me from age 13 years. They made huge sacrifices for me and I knew it. We were intertwined, very close and very committed to giving their wish. My granny had dementia from two big strokes, it was horrible the day she didn’t remember me. My gramps was a major challenge, 92 yrs old and did not want to give up any control. I had to bite my tongue many times. Most of 2-3 years I basically moved in only going home when a family member could relieve a day or two. We were always very close but a different type of closeness came from me arguing with him and he admit he could do it anymore. His death was more silent, Kidney Disease, you go into a come and go to the Lord in about two days. He had 2 types of cancer we were battling but his kidneys took center stage. I’m a much better person for having the strength to handle the difficulties. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • I don’t think you can control them unless they want to do what you want them to… It’s just how it is.

        Liked by 1 person

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